• I Want My Fucking Gluten!

    Okay, listen up. Here’s a reality check for you. We’ve been eating stuff that’s filled with gluten, fat, preservatives, additives, carbs, trans fats, non-trans fats, sterols and cholesterols–both good and bad (you’ve got the up side, I’ve got the down side–there’s two sides to every cholesterol), full-cal, lo-cal, no-cal, so-cal. I don’t suck down vitamins, I don’t give a shit about anti-oxidants (what’s the opposite of those? Pro-oxidants?), and I piss on organic food to make it taste right. I don’t wash my fruit (you think a quick rinse is going to get rid of the months of pesticides?). Light sour cream is a shadow of the real thing, but…

  • Authors I Would Like To Have Dinner With

    Neil Gaiman – We could go out for tea (authentic British tea that doesn’t suck like American tea, or so he says) and real sushi (which I never get because my wife is afraid of raw food, so I have to get the kind from the supermarket). I could ask him about all the cool stuff he’s done, like movies and have a panda on his lap. And how he did his writing with his kids around and what it’s like living a public life as a writer and private life as a parent.  I want to talk about how he plots, because he has a talent for making every…

  • New Year’s Resolutions

    You know what I get sick of? New Year’s Resolutions. Mostly because I read a lot of writer blogs. Why do people do this? Am I the only one who doesn’t? I guess it’s because a new year has come in, people treat it as a new beginning. In January, everybody talks about their New Year’s Resolutions in regard to writing. They’re full of crap inspirational sayings and “go for it” attitudes, trying to encourage the wannabes who read the blog to snag that golden ring. And then they always engage the reader by asking how their doing with their resolutions, like they give a crap. Guess how much you’re…

  • superhero mash-up

    Heroes vs. Villains

    So here’s some thoughts that have been rolling around in my head. Last week at In-Law dinner, we started talking about Michael Jackson. My father-in-law starts ranting, as he often does, about how people could still be worshiping him when he’s a proven pedophile, a drug addict, and overall questionable person. He repeatedly brought up the example, as he often does, of what if you had a priest that was well-known for doing good deeds in the community, donating to charity, overall great guy who did so much, but he’s a pedophile. Of course, I didn’t argue with him then, because he’s one of those types of people who are…

  • Transformers 2: Revenge of the Broken Voicebox

    I have finished watching Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen. Big props to those of you like me who never know what the bloggers are talking about in their posts, because they see it in the theaters, and you wait till it comes out on Netflix. This post is for you. But anyway, I found it weird that this movie is so bad, but so popular. It’s clear that the critics and fans were watching two different films. I knew about all the conflicting opinions going in. But I finally figured out what the appeal of this movie is, and the root of the dissent. Transformers 2 is wrestling. Well,…

  • Charlie Stross Hates Star Trek

    I just have a few things to say about this rant by Charlie Stross who says that he hates Star Trek. Why? Because they hate science. Instead of coming up with legitimate technology, they just have a consultant insert technobabble where appropriate and that drives the plots and pushes obstacles. Stross hates this because it’s poor story writing, in his opinion. His take is that first, he sets up a culture in the future. Then he creates characters that would be consequences of that culture (for example, cell phones and sexting). Star Trek is not like that – the future is background. The situation could take place in any time…

  • Dean Wesley Smith: Current Object of My Ire

    Let’s dish out some ire. I read this article by Dean Wesley Smith and cannot figure out whether he’s just one of those writing rogues whose method works for a smattering of people, or if there’s any value in it. Now let me preface this by saying I’m an unpublished author, so I could, and should be, considered full of shit. But then, so should everyone. The basic premise of this article is that there’s a big myth in the writing industry: rewriting makes something better. This isn’t true. Why? Because you can polish a giant turd as much as you want, but it remains a giant turd. Exsqueeze me?…

  • Things I Have to Do

    Here are the many things that I have to do in the near future, which is the reason why I am continually lashing out like an angry eel. –Make logo for sister’s business–Quickly learn how to properly use Paint Shop Pro so I can make logo for sister’s business–Make salsa–ake more salsa because my wife ate it all and I didn’t get a bite-Find out what I want for Christmas-Find out what baby wants for Christmas–Pick continually ripening vegetables from garden after they become ripe and before they start to rot (which is about a 2-day window)–Post pictures of my kid to Facebook–Let everyone know kid #2 is a girl-Look…

  • Nominations are Awesome

    Today’s rant comes to us from this fellow (and the letter Q). If you read Scalzi’s blog, you’ve probably already seen it. Basically, it’s just a rant on how this guy’s not pleased with the mediocrity of the Hugo nominations for best novel this year, and how the voters are not going for, what he says is, the good, groundbreaking, experimental science fiction. He demands that we, the readers, need to broaden our horizons, and starting picking the right novels (which he conveniently lists for our convenience). He also expressed disgust on how many novels were YA this time around, calling them monotonic and simple. He even tries to lump…