The Weight Loss Pledge

I arrived from Seattle with a hurting foot from all the walking, various souvenirs, and about 43 pounds of overweightness (BMI 28.5).

No, I didn’t gain 43 pounds just in Seattle, but I did eat a lot of fatty food. In fact, I’ve been eating a lot of food for some time, and not doing anything to change my habits. This results in a lethargic me, a surly me, and a me that’s not particularly fun to be around. When I get too much weight, it goes to my liver. And if my liver gets too big, my ribs start poking into it, and my side hurts if I sit for too long. It’s actually a kind of nice warning sign when I’m too heavy.

Now the ideal weight for me is 167 pounds. There is NO WAY I’m ever going to get to that. The last time I weighed that, I was still growing. So I’m not going to take an unrealistic attempt at losing weight. I don’t have time, and I like eating too much. I’m not going to deny one of the few pleasures in my life. I have so few. But something’s got to be done, so I make this pledge.


  • I will write down everything I eat. I will not worry too much about what I’m eating. Just the act of writing it down will prevent me from a lot of unnecessary calorie intake, like idle snacking. That’s what bites me in the ass (and enlarges it).
  • I will record above-mentioned food in my “LoseIt” iPod Touch app. I will attempt to adhere to the calorie budget necessary to lose one pound a week. But I will not worry about restaurants, potlucks, etc. as long as I’m not going nuts the other days of the week.
  • I will not eat large quantities of crap food, just because it’s there. I will not eat large quantities of things that don’t taste good and/or aren’t good for you. Donuts or bagels are no good. I don’t even like bagels that much. I have to slap on half a tub of cream cheese just to make it tolerable. Pizza, on the other hand, is thumbs up.
  • I will only overindulge on food if it is good or something I rarely get. I’m not going to fill up on unlimited French fry baskets or candy corn. However, if there is infinite shrimp, buffalo wings, or (god forbid) barbecue, it’s party time.
  • I will drink more water. Water helps fill me up. Every meal shall be accompanied by a container (8 oz or more) of water in some form.
  • I will not eat just to eat. I will eat to satiate hunger.
  • Being hungry is good. When I am hungry, I will first drink some water before I eat something. If I’m still hungry afterward, I can get a snack or.
  • Before I get a snack, I will eat my lunch first. Better to eat the food I have now than get something from the vending machine when I’m going to eat lunch an hour later.
  • Losing weight and not having a full stomach will lead to state-altering substances (caffiene, alcohol) having an increased effect, so I can get drunk more efficiently.
  • I will take any opportunity I can to A) go for a walk B) do some biking before it gets too cold.

Eric Juneau is a software engineer and novelist on his lunch breaks. In 2016, his first novel, Merm-8, was published by eTreasures. He lives in, was born in, and refuses to leave, Minnesota. You can find him talking about movies, video games, and Disney princesses at http://www.ericjuneaubooks.com where he details his journey to become a capital A Author.

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