One of my worst fears is to be reincarnated as an insect or some other small prey animal. You are guaranteed a horrible, painful death. You are most likely to get destroyed by some other animal, if you don’t smash on a windshield or become some toddler’s torture toy. And animals are not kind to each other. If you can avoid getting your head ripped off after mating, or torn apart in a ant vs. termite war, you’re guaranteed to get eaten. You’ll become old and slow, and eventually you won’t be able to avoid that flicking tongue. And it’s not like there’ll be a crunch and instant death either.…
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Analyzing the Disney Villains: Edgar (The Aristocats)
EDGAR The Aristocats (1970) Edgar Balthazar. I have not seen a worse Disney villain. I think he may be the worst. At least he won’t be making any AFI top ten lists. He’s pathetic, he’s incompetent, he’s dull. Someone like Maleficent or Ursula would have put a bullet in his head on day one. It doesn’t help that he’s in such a tedious movie, but part of the villain’s job is to spice things up. And is there anything more cliche than “the butler did it”? Motivation: A little part jealousy and a little part greed. There’s no originality in a guy seeking vengeance or reclamation because he got cut…
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Analyzing the Disney Villains: Ratigan (The Great Mouse Detective)
RATIGAN Origin: The Great Mouse Detective (1986) Or Professor Padraic Ratigan to his friends. Of which he has many. It’s pretty easy to have a good villain when you’re simply lifting one of the greatest, already existing antagonists in literary history. But adding mouse ears and Vincent Price’s voice goes a long way towards making this one of the most underrated villains in Disney canon. Motivation: Ratigan doesn’t want money — he already has a bunch — nor vengeance nor escape. He wants power. Why? I’m not sure, other than it would be cool to put on his resume. He seems to have a problem with his lot in life…
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Rhinos
Hey, all you rhino poachers. You know how you keep killing rhinos to get their horns so you can sell them on the black market? You know, you don’t have to actually kill any rhinos. Just fake some white powder and leave the rhinos alone. It’s not like your consumers are going to know — they didn’t actually see you kill the rhino. And it’s not like you believe that rhino horn is a real thing — you just want the money. And there’s no test to find out whether what you’ve got is pure unadulterated rhino horn. It’s not like you can test its pH balance with a little…
