Never sign up for more than one job site. At least don’t make your resume public. Because your cell phone will get racked by fucking outsourced recruiters who don’t give shit one about your needs as a job-seeker. They just throw everything at everything and pray. Love that shotgun technique.
And none of them are from companies I applied for. I don’t even need to know what variation of “eInfoTechSysPartnersTalent” they’re from. I know where they’re from because they all have the same four features.
- They’re always Indian. Always. I have never gotten a call from a white man.
- The caller ID says they’re from some out-of-state city, usually coastal. Most common are New Jersey, Texas, and California.
- There’s always that “click” before they answer, just like a telemarketer.
- They all call at the same time.
They also don’t care about holidays. I got seventeen calls from 8 – 8:30 today (Martin Luther King Day). They woke me up on a day off.
And they all use the same script. “Hello, may I speak to Eric please?” “Hello, Eric, how are you today?” “Yes, today, I am calling about a position as a Java Developer. Are you open to new job opportunities?” And that’s the version with perfect English. Sometimes they ask “how I am to being today” or dropping words. It’s like the Family Guy cutaway with the guys who almost speak English.
So I always say the same thing afterward. “I do not take jobs from cold calls from recruiters.” And if they have the nerve to say ANYTHING after that I repeat it, then I say “Please delete my contact info.” Some of them stay on script as if I had never said anything. Some of them say, “no, this isn’t a cold call.” I’m like “psh, yeah right.” Well, what I really say is, “I did not apply to XYZ company, this is a cold call. Please delete my contact information.” Mostly I hear disappointed sighs and meek “okay”s.
And the emails. Dear god the emails. Thanks a bunch job sites. I have to clear my inbox every hour because I have 13 messages from Amichik and Parminder and Supita asking me if I want a 3 month contract in Plano, TX or South Carolina.
The reason this is happening is because I still don’t have a job, so I’ve had to expand my search both in job terms and in sites.
I think Monster and CareerBuilder are the two culprits in this. I haven’t been on either of those since 2008. And I guess I missed the boat that they’re passe now. I hear ads for Indeed and ZipRecruiter (but they target ZipRecruiter to employers, not job-seekers). So like every broken piece of the web, they get swarmed on by scam artists and spam bots. Eaten by the maggots and carrion-weevils of the working world.
