Being a Politician

I have a niggling little voice in my head that keeps saying, “Eric, be a politician.”

And I suppose that’s coming from my strong sense of duty, moral obligation, and service. It’s part of the reason I write books–to demonstrate some moral truth. Better writers than I say “novels should ask the questions, not give answers”. But anyone can bring up a problem. It takes a better man to offer a solution. This is part of the reason I read “Somebody’s Gotta Do It“.

I can’t talk about this without sounding egotistical. I don’t know if I’m a good leader. I used to not be one–selfish and micromanaging and egotistical. But now I’m calmer, I’m mentally stable. I’m still not very personable but I’m good at getting shit done. And more than anything, I feel like I’m never going to see change in the world unless I do it myself. Better an imperfect solution now than a perfect solution that never comes. That’s the motto I would platform on. Must be some of that introversion self-reliance.

Especially because in Minnesota, we’re already democratic and progressive. Have been for years with no signs of stopping. ICE came here and we revolted, forced them to back off. But I don’t live in Minneapolis, and I’m not going to drive all the way there every weekend with a whistle to watch for ICE trucks.

Where would I even start? Maybe I could start small and work my way up. Think globally by acting locally. I want to make change and protesting does shit. That’s part of why I’m frustrated. All these protests and nothing changes. It’s easy for politicians to ignore them, like how idiots can ignore a smoke alarm that needs batteries. But when you start breaking things, that’s when they pay attention.

I feel like I can make wise, rational, informed decisions. I just never get the opportunity. Right now, we’re trying to remodel our kitchen and I can see myself from the outside, not being emotional or chaotic at all. I would be a good speech maker. I could write my own speeches, and they would be funny and entertaining. People would listen. I could be like a John Stewart who’s actually running for office. I’m sorry if that comes off narcissistic, but it’s hard to be unbiased when you’re talking about yourself.

Gun control, school shootings, political assassinations. People are not on the same level of reality as everyone else. They need someone dialed into the real world. If it’s not the psychos who think they can kill their neighbor or evade the police, it’s the politicians who still don’t know what the Internet is or think it’s not part of the real world. There are so many crazy people running. Crazy people who get elected, just because they’re entertaining. They elected Jesse Ventura and Arnold Schwarzenegger just because they were names people knew. The “the rent is too damn high” party. Matt Gaetz, the pedophile. Ted Cruz, the coward. And that’s just nationally. Check your local elections and see who’s running.

I keep an eye on Naomi Kritzer’s blog. She’s a local author, but she posts more about who’s running for office during Minnesota elections, and the commentary/straight talk about them. Usually, there’s one fairly sane candidate. Then there’s others who aren’t in touch with reality, like they’re cartoons disguising themselves as humans, like Judge Doom. Just look at 2024. Most people don’t even have a website or a social media account. You can’t research anything about these candidates’ policies. You can’t find what they stand for, let alone how others evaluate them based on past behavior. Especially look at Royce White.

But introverted politicians are few and far between these days. Today, it’s all about how much noise you can make, whether it makes sense or not. Plus, I do not envy the idea of having to go from door-to-door like AOC did, talking to strangers to garner votes. And I’m not a schmoozer, I’m more robotic and autistic/direct. They say being a politician is nothing but meetings, and meetings always seem like a waste of time to me because people are so bad at communicating what they want.

But here’s the big thing–I can’t ask that of my family. Being a politician means a big sacrifice. It’s not just you running for office; your entire family is running too. I remember a video Tim Walz took of him and his daughter at the Minnesota State Fair, just a little propo talking about how he and his daughter are going to eat some pronto pups, but she’s vegan. And he’s kinda putting her on blast for that. I can’t imagine treating my daughter like that for “clicks”. And they become a target for all your opponents. That’s more pressure than they deserve. Remember how harshly they treated Chelsea Clinton? You have to have a family that looks almost invisible against a light blue sky. And big smiles with perfect teeth.